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Spring Clean Your Apartment (For Real)

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Smart City
May 29, 2017

Having a clean apartment clears your mind. It frees your soul. It opens doors for new realities.

But really, it just saves you time and money in the long run when you eventually leave your apartment.

We know what you’re thinking: why would I waste my time cleaning my apartment now when I can just get it all in one clear shot when I move out. It’s not like you own it, or anything. There’s probably very little investment besides that one photo you hung up when you attempted to make a photo wall and realized how impossible it actually is (#pinterestfail).

How about that little thing you count on when you move out called “the deposit?” Depending on your complex or landlord, you paid anywhere from $200 to a full months rent that you are expecting returned! Well, not if you leave it in the hot mess that it’s in now. Here are a few things to focus on while you dust that shelf for the first time since…never.

Good God, man, what leaked in there? | Your Fridge

Fun fact: if you let something sticky sit long enough, you not only won’t be able to get it off, other things will stick to it, creating one giant sticky puddle. You don’t want to have to pay for a brand new fridge because you thought the strawberry leakage that mixed with the broken egg would just dissipate. Clean that ish immediately.

Good God, man, what were you cooking? | Your Stove

Why do the Stove Gods make it so impossible to clean? You can’t detach the electric part without possibly setting your apartment ablaze but you also can’t get into the extra dirty crevices without taking off the burner. It’s life’s greatest catch-22. So grab that little toothbrush and scrub away, my friend, because I can guarantee you did not move in with burnt sugar stuck to your drip pan.

Good God, man, why did you leave all your stuff? | Your Stuff

One of the biggest complaints from landlords is all of the crap that the tenants leave behind. This is exactly why spring cleaning was invented. Shed your skin! Or, in other words, get rid of everything you haven’t used in a year. Don’t be the jerkwad who makes someone else pick up your dirty underwear (literally or figuratively) and throw it away or, better yet, give it away! You know you can itemize all of that and take it off of your taxes, right? We’re just saving lives over here, nbd.

Good God, man, look what the cat dragged in! | Your Floors

It’s time for you to be a grown up and get a vacuum. There’s nothing worse than visiting someone’s apartment, taking off your shoes and stepping in something…crunchy. Aren’t you trying to impress the people you’re bringing home? That’s a sure way to never get them to come back (unless that’s what you’re aiming for, then drop all of those Cheerios!). But really, now is the time to clean your carpet and tile. Move your bed. Move your couch. Vaccuum all the things.

And if this seems like too much work for you because you’re lazy, hire a cleaning lady or lad. It’s that simple.


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